Engaged to integrity in all my relationships

there are two thoughts merging here
when I speak to all these words
that make up the sentences and pages I speak true
to all I am thinking and feeling
so sometimes what I am thinking is wrong -
or I am not sure of a particular feeling
it goes to speak of honesty, sincerity, integrity
how honest I strive to be
how vulnerable I willing make myself
to define in all practical and poinant terms
of truth and genuine accountability
I am engaged with integrity in all my relationships
and yes, I think I am quite smart,
however it defies no odds how confused I become
when I try to understand just what you mean
for all the casual ways you speak
the questions you ask make me think
your not sure how you should treat me,
not sure of who I am really now that I think of it,

let me not forget to tell you how angry I was when ******
you called a time or two and said you where on your way
now, I know that time, in a couple different contexts
means quite different things between me and you
as I also know you are given to making others wait
you could even say they should expect it
and you yourself, are never subjected to the experience
so be it any reason, in this instance it is work work work,
the reason you are so late and unapologetically
and it felt for a moment you thought I should consider it my luck
you could find some time to see me
when I say its back to the white lie--
its the lie I think I pull off flawlessly
and with absolute transparent intentions
I try to handle our relations the way you do,
since you don't seam to feel as I do, a bit put off and confused
but let me reflect on all these thoughts I've been thinking of late.
no, I can't be you. Treat you in the same ways as I have been treated by you
forgive myself for not demanding more of you before I learned,
and decided for all you have,
you have lacked honor and above all; Integrity